📍 Madeira, Portugal 🇵🇹

Well, we can officially confirm they call Madeira the “Hawaii of Europe” for a reason. Get ready for a lot of pictures.

Day 1: After an early flight, we made it to the island of Madeira. Once we landed, we got our car and headed to…any guesses?

If you guessed “to find food” you are a true fan of “Where The Fork Are We” and you are, in fact, correct. The food was just average, but it felt so nice to be on the island that we were too excited to even care (a sentence you will probably not often hear from us).

We ate, waited for about three hours for J to go to the bathroom (lord help us if J is on island time; J time is already slow enough) and we were on our way to our first tourist stop: the observation deck. The deck has a glass floor where you could look down and see the edge of the cliff with the water and the city directly below you. Great place to face your fear of heights (says someone who’s not afraid of heights).

It was truly our only day to be a tourist so we tried to make the most of our time. We went to Porto Moniz-Seixal for more views that did not disappoint. The first place we stopped along the route was a nice little pull out on the side of the road. Very easy access. The next place, not so much. The option was either park at the top of a large (like, really large) hill and hike down OR attempt to drive down said large hill and see where the road takes you. We had a big hike the next day and needed our legs to be in tip-top condition, soo we went down with a car and a prayer.

We drove around the island a bit (and by a bit, I mean far enough that we ended up in some guy’s yard…my bad) and then found another spot that we wanted to see. We tried to go down but I was slightly grumpy and it looked like there was some film crew and some of the roads were blocked, so I made the executive decision to turn around and start heading back to our area. We had been out exploring for a while and wanted to find something local to eat. SUCCESS. We saw a random restaurant on the side of the road called Taberna da Serra and it was as authentic as it comes. How do you know, one may ask. Well, for starters, there was absolutely no English on the menu. Fail proof sign that it will be authentic, not so fail proof in knowing you are getting what you want. Luckily, everything we ordered was great and it was an overall win. The waitress told us about this alcoholic milkshake-like drink that was coconut flavored. After tasting it, I was soon going to be an alcoholic.

We had a big day ahead of us, so we went back to our island home and April and I walked to the store to get groceries to make breakfast and lunch for our hike the next day (we’re so outdoorsy). We stayed up way later than we meant to and before you know it our 4:45am alarm was going off and it was time to hike.

Day 2: The big day. We were picked up around 4:45am and taken to the peak of Pico Do Arieiro where we watched the sunset and mentally prepared for the six mile hike from peak to peak of the highest two mountains on the island (or what felt like the world). We were lucky and got to watch one of the most beautiful sunrises. On the top of a mountain. On an island in Portugal. Pretty hard life.

The sun was up and it was time to start hiking. It took us a while because we stopped every seven steps to take pictures (and sometimes to catch my breath), but it was beautiful. It’s one of those “pictures don’t do it justice” kind of things, but I highly recommend this form of exercise, even on vacation (which is saying a lot coming from me).

Things were going well, we made it over the sketchy stairs where each edge was a VERY large drop off the side of the mountain, up steep hills, down steep hills, and then we hit flat ground. We stopped for a second and once we stopped on the flat ground, I tripped over absolutely nothing and took a tumble. Honestly, I couldn’t explain this fall if I tried. It was like a slow motion fall after absolutely no one pushed me. Unexplainable, a little painful, but at least I was not on the edge of the mountain so we’ll call it a win.

We made it to the top of the other peak, Pico Ruivo, and celebrated with a photoshoot for your enjoyment (and ours too, of course).

The hike had two options: you could book a ride that dropped you off at peak one and picked you up at peak two or you could hike back to peak one after reaching peak two. We booked the first option and I still thank myself for that. It was absolutely beautiful and worth the hike, but one-way was enough when the most exercise we had completed on the trip was walking from one restaurant on flat ground to another. After all, this is called where the FORK are we for a reason.

We got back to our area of the island and our Airbnb host had told us about the basket rides in Madeira. We had no idea what she was talking about, but we were going to find out. In true “us” fashion, we were curious but also hungry. So, we found a local place called Snack Bar Bela 5 to have a quick meal. We worked hard for this one and I’m unsure if we were that starving or it was just that good—regardless, we enjoyed. We also found some cool wall art on the way.

We rode a gondala up to the top of a mountain where these basket rides were.

We got there and the line was at least 100 people long. If my dad were there, we would’ve turned right around at the sight. Thankfully, he was home probably working, golfing, or watching TikTok on the toilet so we were able to decide to stay and wait in line. Thank gosh we did (see Richard, it does payoff sometimes). Some men in some funky shoes pushed us down a hill in a basket. Words will not do this activity justice—please enjoy a few videos and pictures.

After an adventure-filled day (maybe one of my favorites of the trip) we were exhausted. We had some dinner and eventually crashed.

Day 3: It was our last day on the island and April and I woke up to have breakfast before we left. We went to the Brunch Club and had a very delicious breakfast and walked around the town a bit.

We met up with J to try the signature drink of the island, poncha, before we left. We went to Rei da Poncha to try it. It was good and although I don’t speak Portuguese, I’m going to translate poncha as punch because it was prettyyy strong.

I wanted to see these cool houses on the island, but we didn’t have time so we went to an overlook where all the planes were taking off and landing. We watched for a bit and then headed to the airport where it was our turn to fly out.

This is also when I left my sweatshirt in the rental car and didn’t realize it until after going through security. It worked out that the ONE time we were early to the airport I had enough time to run out, find the rental car, locate the missing sweatshirt, and go through security again. Gotta love small airports.

Outtakes: